Monday was just a bad day. Didn’t get enough sleep, thats always bad. Then I get my radiation treatment and it burns a bunch.I ask to see a doctor and I do get several prescriptions renewed. But I am tired and out of energy,almost fainted in the doctors office. And then in the afternoon I had a frightening nausea episode. My whole body shook violently but , (fortunately?) nothing came up. I panicked thinking, oh shit, a couple weeks of this and I will lose 30 pounds as I could not imagine anything going down, even water. Undoubtedly a feeding tube and maybe that stuff will come up. It subsides a tiny bit and I get a nausea pill down, the one that has worked flawlessly up till now. No effect. I just keep walking, for at least an hour I just walk around the house and the movement helps settle things down. Later that evening I settle down and even eat a little oatmeal. This will be my first sub 2,000 calorie day in a couple weeks. The morning brings better tidings. Some sleep, not much nausea, I manage to eat more oatmeal.
Counting today 8 radiation treatments remaining. So after tomorrow I’m wondering if it will feel like the may be in sight. Tomorrow is the third and last chemo treatment. The first one hit me pretty hard, the second one much less than expected. Despite the lower impact of the second chemo my body still cringes having a body memory of the first.What will the third be like? My body is run down by the cumulative effects of the radiation. Only the prospect of an approaching end and grim resolution keeps me going. I ordered a book my friend Peter recommended, its ‘Runner’ by Lizzy Hawker, an ultra marathoner on a Mount Blanc race. Just getting into it, maybe something to read during the 5.5 hour chemo treatment tomorrow. Its hard to reading anything much past internet bits and pieces, brain just a bit scrambled.
The doctor had suggested to treat food as medicine and just eat on schedule regardless of the lack of appetite. My friend Bob has a better description of the process. Ever had a colonoscopy? I’m not trying to be gross, there is a lesson in here. I’ve had several. I got to drink a gallon of soapy liquid to flush out the system. The first glass isn’t that hard, I think I can get through this. But glass after glass it just gets worse. And then I get to do more at the hospital. Well eating is like that, first bite isn’t so bad. It takes me an hour to eat a bowl of soup working as continuously as I possibly can. Getting 2,000 calories is a marathon event.
Looked for an appropriate song, came up with a great one by the Police called ‘King of Pain’
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